IM SO PROUD OF SINGAPORE! first asian idol comes from singapore!!! :DDD i got a strong feeling singapore will win cus hady is the most good looking! :x YES! :D

went to christmas gathering at xz's church in DHOBY GHAUT (i spelt correctly finally after someone corrected me -.-)
PLEASE HELP. i realy need to. REALLYY. :( sobs i cant stop thinking. i hope my prayers are heard. but normally is other ppl pray then effective rite. HELP!!! :( sobsob... i dunwan to go tat pae :((( dun wan.sob. its so ass far. blame it on my darn results and cca.my mom kinda regretted not letting me join the cca i wanted at first. MUSIC. i love music since small. my dreams were shattered wen my mom forbade.0 dear o dear ... cant blame anyone anw. she wanted me to concentrate on studies. i believed her at first tat olvl oni results show everything. but NO. sobsob. sobsobsob. duno wad to sae liao -.-

so today, i was yet again, mentally prepared to receive those funny looks of theirs. "HEY QY, u got go for pae? wad sch ah?"
my reply "**** lor"
others "oooh."
ask them wad sch "anderson" "catholic" "temasek" "ny lor"
actually i shd be happy for them. but im unable to. wenever i tink i m going to a school strangers all around. and not a gd one indeed. sobsob.

i oso dun like ppl spreading whr i went. ok maybe i did tat myself.but tats becus im proud of them getting into that particular sch.if anyone wanted to noe ask ME. if i noe anyone does tat, (i alrdy noe some) i wld be deeply disappointed. i alrdy am. duh. but forget it. i noe if i had gotten into some gd sch, i wld be showing off now and not begging ppl not to spread arnd. i wld love them to spread. if its gd of cos. sobsob. i wun be sobbing so mani times here if i put in my best. and not waste time for nothing. i wld have done better.

im blaming myself. look, its me.

i dun wan to think back anymore!!!!! once i tink of ch i wld think of geog n ss. wen i tink of geog i totally lost confidence. at first i still have. but i tink more n more my bit of confidence was gone. now i thought the whole paper was disasterous (spell?)..ss oso. at first i still gave miss zaiton a thumbs up. now it seemed like everything had gone into ash. ok at least i noe i can do it for maths n am. i tot my eng can get like b4. now i tink a c6 wld be the extreme.why i become like that!!! omg.

i hope i can exchanged all my maple goodies n audition for my pae n results.i got a feeling i wld get into the same sch as my bro AGAIN.but not IT of cos. sob. but i dun wan.but im the least confident in my english. GP!!. sobsob. how many times mus i sob u noob. arse. sry readers. tis blog is jus for me to vent everything tat i wanted to sae.i roughly noe who are those regular readers too. thanks anw for visiting and letting me noe theres people who wanted to know abt me.or maybe see how im dying? haha.if i realli die then too late for u all to pity me man. lol. :)

RAH