i think im a very BIG busybody.

...

sad?compiled with mine altogether. VROOM. ultimate . everything is not going well.

i wish i could start all over again. ive let myself down. my chemistry was so hopeless that i din bother to check once ive done. i just slept. for the last 20min. i din check because i knew even if i check nothing wld be right. its not about careless. i DON'T KNOW how to do. felt as if ive returned to lower sec, the hopelessness when u see so many questions u duno how to answer. yes, i din bother to study in the first place. ive done other busybody stuffs. what a sleepless night. yet the future is so bleak. to think i was trying so hard to squeeze out all my revision for chemistry, 2 weeks ago. i din touch anymore after that.

to think i can use paper 1 to pull up my mark, both are dead together. in fact i think i did worse for paper1. its a miracle if i get 15 points out of 40. im not suaning people. this is the truth. i typed all here, because ive no place left to vent all these out. and no ppl will come visit me anw. maybe cecilia will come bah. sorry anw. my mood was so bad that i could not console how u did for ur papers like i did ytd. sorry for not replying sometimes.

oh. i think i mentioned to some ppl before i wanted to give up chemistry. exclude from my L1R5. but my 8years of maths tuition teacher encouraged me to carry on and push myself. she told me i must get A1 for amaths because she din get one ._. and my physics, i tink only so-so bah. this, im satisfied. because i know that ive put in my best effort in doing every question and even checked.

i hope i could do better in english than every other subject. an outsider, my english tuition teacher, had been encouraging and coaching me all these while, without complaining how stupid i am. she still said im very nice to teach. my heart warmed. she oso said she always rmb her students in her prayers. esp me. isit because im near to hopeless? ive tried my best in english. if i still couldnt get my B tis time, i would continue to try, for the sake of my teacher, and most importantly myself.

the fear of handing my result slip to mama is back again. i hate this.

i think i don't care so much next time ok. ive done too much. and i dun have guts. mmm..why is my chair shaking, or isit me? o.o' i think i go get more sleep zz